One of the things that everyone has to deal with is how to easily "clean up" after a night of lovemaking. The best thing to use is an old, but clean long-sleeve T-shirt!

Take the body of the shirt and lay it gently between her legs to prevent "wet spots" on the sheets.

She turns on her side and he spoons up behind her.

He takes one of the sleeves and places it over his member to soak up any wetness that is left.

They can curl up together and talk about each other or their favorite lovemaking activities

Here's to more passion in your bedroom and in your life!

Jack

The Earliest Secret to Successful Lovemaking

After New Years, I was looking through some of my favorite websites and came across an article with information that was completely new to me. That is fairly
unusual as I consider myself an expert in lovemaking positions and lovemaking in general. It is information that may be completely obvious to the women on
this special mailing list, but I assure you that it is nearly unknown to the gentlemen.

Ladies - if it is obvious to you, you need to tell your guy. We had no idea!

Old news - women take longer to warm-up and become sexually excited than men. Men are visual and a glimpse of skin here or there is enough to get us going or at least interested. Women generally take longer and need to have feelings of love and partnership to really get in the mood. There are exceptions, but these trends are generally accepted and hold true.

New News - foreplay starts with the the "Honey Do List"! I am sure that there are different names for it in different countries. In the US, it is called the "Honey Do" list. This is the list of things that the wife or girlfriend wants the husband or boyfriend to do around the house or the apartment. Is also the
list that most of the men postpone till they are forced or the woman begs or yells to force the issue.

Leonard Felder is a psychologist in Los Angeles and wrote about this at some length in his article, "Did You Know the 'Honey Do List' is the Beginning of
Foreplay?". The link is http://www.menstuff.org/columns/felder/12.html .

He had a man and woman in his office that were having trouble. The woman turned to her husband and said, "...didn't you know that the 'honey do' list of
chores is the beginning of foreplay? If you help out with the childcare or cleaning up after a meal or changing a light bulb, I start thinking of you as a
great protector , a loving partner, and a reliable source of strength. That usually starts my sense of intimacy to begin heating up at bit, especially if you
pitch in voluntarily BEFORE I have to beg or get all bitchy and fed up, which invariably shuts down any sexual feelings I might have been starting to build."

Ladies, if this is obvious to you, make sure your man knows it. Do not take advantage of it, but you could turn it into a game. For every hour he spends
cleaning up, he gets an hour of your undivided attention. Do not use it every time, but a few times can help him get the idea.

Guys, if you are trying to get more of her time to try out some of the many lovemaking positions at http://www.illustrated-lovemaking-positions.com and having trouble with begging, pleading or demanding, stop it! The more you try, the worse it gets. I imagine that this is old news for some of you.

Instead, spend some time nurturing her and the relationship. Paint the house, help her wash some dishes. Do some of those un-manly things that you can't brag to the guys about, but she can brag about you!

The only problem -

Make sure that you do not do so many chores that you are too sore or too tired for later activities!

May all your problems be that easy to solve.

Jack

I do not normally look at the horoscopes. There may be something to them or not. I was looking at the Yahoo page and I clicked on the horoscope link by accident. I was about to click away, but I glanced anyway.

The article was by Mark Lernener at http://www.astrology.com/. He said -

"Anytime Venus and Mars form one of these powerful alignments, romance can receive a jolt. The question is whether that jolt is positive or negative. Much depends on your current outlook on life and if you can handle the daily pressures that are a natural part of working in harmony with a loved one."

Timeless advice, whether it is due to Mars and Venus or not. Life brings may things that can affect your love life.

My wife once broke her collar bone when our daughter was only a month old. She ended up in an upper body cast for 3 months and had to move back to her parents (4 states away) so that they could take care of the baby while she mended.

There was post-partum depression, general depression in that she could not care for our first-born, physical discomfort and loss of sleep (ever tried to sleep with a cast from your waist up?)

I drove to see her and our daughter every other week and was finally able to bring them home about this time of year.

When she got home, the bone had healed, but her arm muscles were nearly useless from being in the cast. She could barely take care of the baby and could barely fix meals.

She could barely lift her arm to brush her teeth and washing her hair was out of the question.

To say that our romance took a jolt would be an understatement, but just as Mark says, the outcome depends on your outlook on life.


Every few days, we would put our daughter to bed and I woud run a bath for the two of us. I made sure the bathroom was warm and brought in candles, 2 glasses of wine and shampoo.

She would sit in front of me, facing away and we would talk about how wonderful our daughter would be as she grew up, we would drink the wine and I would wash her hair, taking our time to enjoy the candlelight, the soapy water and the feeling of washing her hair.

After drying it, we would prop up pillows to find a comfortable lovemaking position and have a great time together. No hanging from the chandeliers, but wonderful, reconnecting love.

Keep in mind that we were living in a small apartment, the money was low from all the medical and travel expenses and our daughter still had a bit of colic and would interupt us from time to time.

It was a time that would either make us or break us. Our outlook was that this was a very tough time, but would make a great story one day that could help other couples see how to get through a tough time.

We still light candles around the tub from time to time and I still enjoy washing her hair (and you can bet she enjoys me doing it)!

The holidays, no matter what holidays you celebrate can be a time of tension as well as celebration. If you and your special someone have a hard time during the season, remember that the outcome will be a reflection of your outlook.

Make sure you schedule some private time together to get away from the inlaws and family to stay connected to each other. Find your favorite lovemaking positions and spend some quiet time together.

If nothing else, get some candles, some wine and shampoo...

Tell everyone your are just trying to save water...

Jack

For men or women - something fun -

Get naked in bed or on the floor and lick your favorite part of your lover's body. Then tear off the tip and sprinkle a little of the candy powder on your lover's body. Do not be surprised if they can not feel it, but go back and lick the good stuff off of their good parts.

Do not place it inside the vagina, but everywhere else is great. Ladies, great for sprinkling it on his best part and then licking it off - slowly!

A quick and inexpensive foreplay tip that can be lots of fun...

Jack

I know, this article is not about lovemaking positions or sex positions, but this is the week of the Victoria's Secret TV show and the one time of the year when grown men do what they would never think of doing any other time - they buy lingerie for the special woman in their life.

And they usually mess it up.

Most of the sales of expensive lingerie during the holidays are made by men. Many, if not most, will end up in a drawer and never see the light of day again.

They end up being the wrong size (a deadly sin no matter which way it is wrong), the wrong color or something completely wrong for her.

Picking lingerie can be a minefield. Here is what guys need to know to do it successfully.

Ladies, find a way to get this information to the poor boy.

Way too many guys buy romantic lingerie for their girlfriends/wives with their hearts (or other parts of their bodies) and not their heads. It is one of the great romantic ironies that in this area more than any other gift, he needs information, advanced planning, and some cash in the bank.

He needs information so that when he goes to make a purchase, he has the confidence to do it correctly, like a gentleman. He needs advanced planning so that he knows what to purchase to light up her life. He needs a bit of cash in the bank to spend.

The Danger and The Bliss
All women are concerned about their looks. The further away the garment is from their skin, the less perfect is has to be. A flower for her hair is not a big deal if it is not the perfect color. A hat or jacket can be returned. Getting a bit closer, a blouse needs to go with her clothes and style. Intimate apparel is in direct contact with her beatutiful body and needs to be perfect.

The reason is that any gift from him is a reflection on how he wants her to be. If he presents her with a teddy that is cheap and sleazy, she will believe that he thinks of her that way. Even if he wants her to be a tigress, his gift needs to reflect a sophisticated tigress, not an alley cat.

If he buys the wrong size, may whatever Higher Authority he believes in help him. If he buys a size too small, she may feel fat and his gift will be a strong hint that he wants her to loose weight. He can apologize all he wants, but he will be going down in flames for a long, lonely time.

If he purchases something too large, there are two possible reactions (all bad).

Bad Reaction #1: If the too large item is worn below the waist, she will think that he thinks that her hips, or worse, her derriere is too large.

Bad Reaction #2: If the too large item is worn above the waist, she will believe that she is deficient in that area since he chose something that is obviously larger than she is.

Finally, if he actually wants her to wear it, the color needs to be correct. There are some safe harbors here that we will discuss below.

There are some great ways to pick out the perfect romantic lingerie। When done correctly, he can be one of the very few men on earth who can correctly purchase romantic lingerie for their women.


Do Not Buy The Cheap Stuff
Next to getting the wrong size, the next worse thing he can do is to get something cheap.

I cannot say this enough. If he is wanting to make a good romantic impression, stay away from the cheap stuff. She will know in an instant that it is poorly made and that it will be uncomfortable.

She will think that he believes that she has poor taste if he thinks she will ever wear the item. If he gives her some open cup babydoll with a g-string made out of red elastic, he had better be sure that she will like it and that she will be thrilled with it. If there is any doubt, go with something from an upscale store.

Making the Purchase
If he has her sizes and a good idea of what he wants to get, it is time to make the purchase. Time to go to the intimate apparel department or store and tell the salesperson what he is trying to do. He should tell her that he wants to get something sensuous for his girlfriend or wife, but that he wants it to be comfortable for her to wear and well made. These are magic words, so make sure to use them.

Just the fact that he is asking the correct questions will get him a level of respect reserved only for gentlemen and he will get some great advice.

My preference is to visit a smaller shop just for intimate apparel. He will get better service and the salesperson will become part of his team to make sure the item is perfect. He can even tell his special love that he "consulted with Kim at ABC shop and she specifically said that if it is not perfect, that you should go see her and she will make it so."

This is a whole lot better than, "I got this for you and I hope you like it." He should be confident in this endeavor and should show it.

Finally, include a card. It shows that he cares and it should tie the gift to his feelings for her. This also is a final fail-safe. It makes clear that his feelings and intentions are genuine and if the garment is not perfect, it lets her know that he thinks she is perfect just the way that she is.

After he has given her the perfect lingerie, make sure you both have several of your favorite lovemaking positions picked out to try!